


To Thine Own Self Be True

by tomfoolery14



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Boys In Love, M/M, Past Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Post-Canon, Sobriety, Supportive Alec Lightwood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-12
Updated: 2019-05-12
Packaged: 2020-03-01 09:46:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18797884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tomfoolery14/pseuds/tomfoolery14
Summary: Six months sober has been a struggle for Magnus at times, but there are things worth fighting for.





	To Thine Own Self Be True

Sometimes Magnus struggled with sobriety. Some days, the temptation for the alcohol-soaked haze of an unclear mind was nearly unconquerable.

Particularly in Edom, the attraction of forgetting was most appealing. There was a stash his father had kept in his citadel, the kind that would burn through a mortal body in seconds but in Magnus would set his magic ablaze within him to consume him in the comfort of unholy flame and temporary oblivion.

Temperance was a concept he had never applied himself to—what reason had he had in the past? Everything had changed now, though. There was a new kind of hope that led him, the likes of which he’d never had before, and he wanted to pursue it with a clear head.

After a long day of consultations, he steps through the portal and into the loft with a satisfied kind of exhaustion. Being Alicante’s high warlock certainly keeps him busy, but he wouldn’t have it any other way.

He’d lived lifetimes in a world where no warlock would ever be able to set foot in Alicante. Not long ago, Alec was considering accepting a position as consul but turned it down because it would take him somewhere that Magnus couldn’t follow.

But here they were, together.

Alec was standing on the balcony, forearms pressed to the railing as he looked out at the sprawling city glowing gold in the darkness. When he heard the familiar cadence of Magnus’ footsteps, he straightened up and looked over his shoulder with a relaxed grin. “Hi. You’re home.”

“You’re a sight for tremendously sore eyes, my love,” Magnus replied tiredly, his body sagging slightly against the sturdy press of Alec’s body. Being enveloped in the welcome embrace of his husband, a tremendous peace settled in Magnus’ bones. “I could use a drink, hmm?”

There’s a sparkle in Alec’s eye when he turns towards the little table already set with two clean tumblers and a large bottle with light amber liquid. Apple juice, Magnus guesses—pineapple is much lighter, and the only grape juice he can tolerate is red.

It still sets his heart fluttering in his chest with an overabundance of affection and devotion when he remembers what it was like to come home to find that Alec had replaced every bottle of alcohol on the drinks cart with multiple juice variants, including some new mixes he admitted he had been experimenting with. It was a small act of selflessness, but Magnus didn’t think he could ever forget it.

Accepting the proffered glass, he smiles at Alec, unfettered and free. “You’re a gem, Alexander.”

It comes as no surprise when Alec waves off the praise, reticent as always to allow any kind of commendation for his kindness. “I have something for you,” he says instead, reaching into his pocket to retrieve a small, flat box. “You’ve been sober for six months now and I’m so proud of you. At those mundane meetings Izzy went to, they talked about how some places give out these little coins for varying lengths of sobriety. I know that you’re in a different place than the people that go to those meetings and it’s not the same thing, but I just wanted you to know that it matters.”

A lump rose in Magnus’ throat and he took the box with trembling fingers. He was familiar with AA, had had a lover in the past who had attended meetings for years at Magnus’ own urging. There were vastly dark periods in his past where he considered himself a functioning alcoholic and almost went himself, but something always held him back.

Removing the lid slowly revealed a silver coin with delicate engraving set inside. Around the edge at the top half, “to thine own self be true” was written in Latin script, and in the center was a triangle with a six inside.

“I love you, Magnus Lightwood-Bane,” Alec murmured, putting his palm against Magnus’ cheek. “I will always love you and support you, unconditionally and forever.”

He turned his head to press his lips against calloused skin and rough archer’s fingers. Those wonderful hands that gave and sacrificed. “You will never know how much I love you, Alexander Lightwood-Bane.”

For everything that Magnus got from alcohol—the comfort, the chance to forget, the illusion of peace—none of it could even hold a candle to what loving and being loved by Alec,  _sober_ , could give.

**Author's Note:**

> come find me on [tumblr](http://royaltybane.tumblr.com)


End file.
